I am married, happily married. I am a woman wrapper, yes, I won't lie, I am a woman wrapper, I do whatever my wonderful, lovely, gorgeous wife wants me to do, who wan die? I have said it; o ya, sue me. as I write, she is looking over my shoulders and dictating every word of this wonderful essay. No, it is the truth; I am happily married to my wonderful, lovely, gorgeous wife. Actually every happily married man is a woman wrapper. Any man who says he does not take "nonsense" from his wife is divorced or dead or both.
Priceless marriage tip: If a man ever tells you, "I will not take that from my wife, mba O!" na lie, it is a big lie, the yeye man takes that and more from his wife and thanks his wife for the privilege of taking nonsense from her! Even my father, the dreaded Papalolo, was a woman wrapper. Don't mind him, he is still very alive and he is still a woman wrapper. When I was growing up, we called him "Na Because Of You" behind his back. You see, my mother was a very reasonable person, however, whenever she was pregnant, she loved driving my father insane. In the middle of the night, she would wake up and sweetly request that my father go out and split the firewood for tomorrow's cooking. My father would gnash his teeth like Okonkwo, turn to me and hiss: "Na because of you O, it is because of you that I am going to do this!" And he would go out and split the firewood! At midnight! Whenever my dad resumed splitting firewood in the dead of night, the village knew Mamalolo was pregnant again. I am lying of course, in the sixties, we cooked with gas and we used our microwave to warm our low-fat milk and NO ONE would dare interrupt my father as he watched American Idol on his plasma TV - but you get my gist sha.
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